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I'm just sort of a generalized perv who digs rough sex and a few other kinks and quirks. No way in hell could I talk about topping or being a sub like most of the folk here, no way I am prepared to discuss the proper way to execute suspension bondage or what is better for the task at hand, leather, synthetic, or horse hair.

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One, I think for all the labels of deviant and fucked up or whatever else, expressions of non-traditional sexual behavior, kink, as it were, are ultimately cerebral, and ultimately human. They have times in which they like to test themselves.

People, after all, are not all happy shiny wonderful honorable wonder and light. They have seedy or sadistic or submissive or cold moments.

And people can examine endlessly if they want, look at cultural modifiers and implications and influences all they want, this does not change the fact that people are wired with both admirable and less than admirable quirks and urges, and it does not change the fact that in some way or another, these things will come out.

That might be in a controlled way, or an uncontrolled way, it might be exercised, it might explode.

But these things are there, and I think denying them is actually pretty bad for ones health, so yeah, giving the dark side some airtime? Some people do this via art; some do it via writing or music. I have to be "good, caring, socially acceptable, generally polite human" every day of the week, so when it comes to fucking, I don't want to be that human, I want to be the other part.

Some people sick it out into private journals or channel it into contact sports. Consenting sexual contact between adults, of course, but yeah…I'm big on good old fashioned hate fucking. The animal part, the selfish part, the mean or cruel or dehumanized part, the not human-objectified part.

Yeah, I am odd like that…I know many people engage in verbal degradation or humiliation as part of a role playing exercise, and enjoy it because they know their partner doesn't really mean what they are saying, or the context is reclaimed or specialized, where the words and acts are not truly intended to be ugly, but rather something special and ritualized and actually, a signifier of trust or intimacy or affection between the parties involved…I'm not one of those people.

When people, in a sexual context, say ugly things to me, as it were, I want them to mean it. If anything "nice" need be in there, a sense of awe will do.

I want what is ugly to be as real there as when I look at a flower and find it pretty. Horrible me, I know, engaging in such things, but yeah…I like the power plays and domination and control and all the actual selfish, "using", ID driven crap to be real. If some guy is going to grab my hair, calling me a filthy whore, pitch me on my back, and tell me to choke on his fucking cock…it better be believable.

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